Posted by: Calvin | February 13, 2009

Floppy Disk Dilemma

I am working on a very large transaction at work.  As part of the work, I hired a contractor (who was recommended by another lawyer in town) to give an expert opinion on a small part of the matter.  Her report was to be accompanied by pictures.  I got the opinion today and she provided the pictures . . . get this  . . . on floppy disks.  To be sure you know what I am talking about, I mean these:


We do not have any computers at my office that will read or write data to or from floppy disks.  I am shocked that in 2009, a professional in my industry is still using a computer that does not at least write to a CD. 

Do any of you have floppy disk drives at home or work?  Am I being a snob here?  Please comment.  I need to know!

Posted by: Calvin | February 4, 2009

Random x 25 = Me

After being tagged on Facebook by my high school boy friend’s then best friend, I added 25 Random Things About Me to my Facebook Notes.  This is lifted from there.  I am taking after LSMwho thought to turn her list into a blog post.  Like her, I do not plan to tag any one, but I would enjoy reading 25 things about you.

  1. I tend to follow the rules and am often bothered when others do not. Perhaps it is an occupational hazard.
  2. I began learning how to play the violin at the age of 38, when my then 4 ½ year old son decided he wanted to take lessons. I am now in Book 2 of the Suzuki violin repertoire. (Do not look for me in an orchestra any time soon!)
  3. I was the first member of my family to get a post graduate degree.
  4. I am a Florida Bar Board Certified Real Estate Attorney.
  5. I can operate a lift truck. (It is always good to have a back up plan.)
  6. I won my first (and only) golf tournament (low gross and low net) the first year I learned to play in the summer before fourth grade by scoring a 31 for 3 holes!
  7. My favorite dessert is the Melting Hot Chocolate Soufflé at Roy’s.
  8. If it were not for good friends who were there for me and my family in our time of need, I have no doubt my Mother would have died in June of 2004. I am thankful to them everyday and repay the favor by being there for others when they need me.
  9. I was a resident assistant in college.
  10. I rarely buy clothes or shoes that are not on sale.
  11. Being on a boat in the 10,000 islands with my family relaxes me.
  12. The first thing I do after I check into a hotel is fill up the ice bucket in my room.
  13. I listen to a lot of talk radio. My kids say that is why I get stopped at so many traffic lights.
  14. I had my first child when I was 34, and my second when I was 36.
  15. My Dad grows pineapples in his yard and they are the best pineapples I have ever tasted.
  16. I got married on a sailboat at sunset.
  17. I miss my Grandma.
  18. I am a keeper, but I hope to wake up one day and throw or give almost everything I own away and live a minimalist life thereafter.
  19. I have lots of friends that are older than I am. They teach me so much.
  20. I helped coached the under 12 Georgia State Champions when I was in law school even though I had never played soccer before.
  21. I am a free market fiscal conservative and a social moderate.  The closest label for me is probably Liberatarian.
  22. I have been asked to run for public office, but have no interest in being a politician.
  23. I love playing cards.
  24. Without my girlfriends, I would probably be nuts.
  25. My family means the world to me.
Posted by: Calvin | January 30, 2009

My Lucky Guy

There are two types of people, those that buy lottery tickets and those that don’t.  I am the kind that doesn’t.  Fisherman is the kind that does.  I tend to think it is a waste of money, but I keep my mouth shut because I appreciate that he is an optimist and, face facts, if he wins, the money is half mine. 


Last Wednesday, he came home sick from work.  He had a fever of 102 and went to bed early.  About 10PM he can into the family room and said, “I gotta go buy a lottery ticket.” 

This is not unusual.  He has gotten out of bed many times, gotten dressed and drove to the closest convenience store just in the nick of time to buy a ticket, or two or five, many times before.  I took pity on him and offered to go for him . . .

“Do you want me to go for you?”

“No, it’s okay. I’ll go.”

“But you are sick, let me go for you.”

“No, I will go.”

“You are going to infect all people in your path.”


“You think you are luckier than me don’t you?”


“If you are so much luckier than me, why haven’t we won yet?”


“I married you didn’t I?”

“Good point, better hurry!”

Posted by: Calvin | January 24, 2009

Condominium Association Meetings – The Usual Suspects


I have the opportunity to attend many condominium association meetings.  Each association is required to have at least one members’ meeting each year; i.e., the “annual meeting.”  In my town, these annual tongue lashings happen January through April.  It is the time of year when the unhappy dissidents come out of their units on their annual pilgrimage to the neighborhood clubhouse so they can complain bitterly to the handful of owners who vounteer  their time to serve on the Board of Directors. 

Here is a sampling of the people that I will undoubtedly run into again this year (the names have been changed to protect the innocent – meaning me so I do not get sued):

  • Mr. Pseudo-Lawyer:  This man comes armed with both the relevant statutes and the irrelevant statutes.  He has not read them all or at least does not understand them completely.  He knows enough to be dangerous.  He has watched many lawyer shows on TV and thinks that he can cross examine as well as any seasoned litigator.  He usually has a couple of specific issues that he is worked up about and will not let them rest until he has had his Perry Mason moment.  Somehow, that moment never comes.
  • Vicky Victim:  This is usually a widowed woman, but could be a man, who has violated the rules and got caught.  It could have been that year or 10 years ago.  Regardless of when the offense occurred, she needs to tell her story and try to get the other owners to feel sorry for her so her violation can continue. 
  • The Giggle Gaggle.  This is a group of women that sit together and whisper to each other.  They have flashbacks to middle school as they roll their eyes in disapproval at the speaker and giggle at inappropriate times.
  • Parliamentarian Paul.  He thinks he knows Robert’s Rules of Order and can’t believe that every one else does not.  He raises points of order and makes people repeat their motions just for effect.  No one knows whether he is correct in his rantings, because few people have actually read Robert’s Rules of Order.
  • Mean Michael.  This is the guy who goes on and on about all of the terrible or “illegal” things that the Board had done or has not done.  In his eyes no one can do things as well as he does or as well as they did things where he comes from.  Yet when he is asked to assist or to do it himself, he can not be bothered.  His time is too valuable, even though he is retired.   He is likely to be booed and jeered by others in the room (think here Giggle Gaggle).  This guy does not care when he is booed.  It makes his day.
  • Big Mouth Bertha:  This woman is in her 60’s, but no one has pointed that out to her.  She still thinks she is in her 20’s and dresses the part.  She wears mini skirts, and I mean very mini skirts.  She will have to stand periodically to yank her skirt down as it rides up her rear while she squirms in her chair.  She can not keep her mouth shut.  She feels the need to audibly react to things that others say during the meeting.  She gives long speeches on all agenda items and makes little sense in the course of her discourse.  She sits in the front row and the whole time she speaks the folks at the head table pray that she keeps her legs crossed or at least closed.  They do not want to know whether or not she is wearing undergarments.

So, if you are a member of a condominium or homeowner association, go to your annual meeting.  There are not enough regular people there to be spectators at the condo commando circus.

Posted by: Calvin | January 22, 2009

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Posted by: Calvin | January 14, 2009

Am I going to the Inauguration?

No way.  But not for the reasons you may think.  When I think of such functions, with thousands of people gathered together in mass crowds, like New Year’s Eve in Times Square or a big outdoor Woodstock type concert.  I contemplate the event and whether attending would be a great experience.  I wonder if being there would be a thrill or maybe even a slice of history.  Then reality hits and I wonder . . . “Where are all of those people going to go the bathroom?” . . . and the decision is easy . . . no way, no how, I’m not going!

Posted by: Calvin | January 10, 2009

Just Me and Little League

Fisherman took both boys to the fish camp this weekend . . . without me.  Another Dad and his son went with them for a guys weekend.  I have the house to myself, no one is pestering me for anything, no one is changing the TV channel or asking if they can use my lap top.  I can eat what I want and do what I want. 

So what am I doing?  I am booked all weekend with Little League Board duties.  This weekend we hold our clinics in advance of our tryouts.  My job is to deal with the tardy parents who did not come to the first, second or third day of regular registration or the first or second day of late registration.  (Which unbeknownst to me is our fault for various creative reasons, so the late fee should not apply to them.)  I also am getting the last minute proof of residency and birth certificates that the people who did come earlier did not bother to bring with them notwithstanding the EXPLICIT instructions telling them it was NECESSARY – apparently for everyone but their kid – because this is really about the kids, right?  Oh, and we need to make sure that late registered player and his best friend Johnny (whose Mom got the word on registration in time to make registration on time, curious, isn’t it?) are on the same team and that they do not have practice on Mondays or before 5:45 pm.  I am sure we understand and will move heaven and earth to make this happen because any other way is really not going to work for them.

So I ask myelf, what in the world was I thinking taking this volunteer job?  When I got the call that fall night from my little league friends begging me to get on the Board, why did I even answer the phone?  Did I not read and digest TPGoddess’ and MTAE’s posts about the hassles of such board positions and the immense amount of time it takes to deeply irritate so many people?  Am I certifiable?  I would answer this question, but I have to go so I am not late for late, late, later registration.  You know how some people do not like having to wait.

Posted by: Calvin | January 8, 2009

Gator Zone



Tonight is the BCS Bowl – the National NCAA Football Championship.  We will be watching and eating football food!

Fisherman is a Gator.  He played football for them in the early ’80’s.  His blood still runs orange and blue.  He would be so pleased if the Uof F Gators win another national title.  I would be most pleased as well.  When things go well for the Gators, Fisherman is much more pleasant to be around. 

Go Gators!

Posted by: Calvin | December 23, 2008

Things I Know For Sure

The things I know for sure:

  • I do not want to run for public office. 
  • Dove chocolate is a great value for the money.
  • There is too much stuff in my house.
  • Everyone is capable of teaching you something.
  • My husband loves me even though he doesn’t buy me a Christmas gift.
  • Money does not make you happy, but it is easier to be happy if you have money.
  • The most important and most demanding job I will ever have is being a parent.
  • In my youth, when I thought I knew everything, I knew next to nothing.
  • I love my husband.
  • Nutty Bars are under rated (especially if you freeze them).
  • Sugar cookies taste better at Christmas time.
  • Friends make the world a better place.

What do you know for sure?

Posted by: Calvin | December 22, 2008

Shopping in the Sunshine

Last Saturday I did the big shop by myself.  I went 3 towns north to shop in a newish open air shopping area.  It is not a traditional mall.  You have to walk outside from store to store.  Frankly I hate it.  But it is convenient for these occasions when I need a variety of items from a variety of stores.  I did my best to park centrally so I could stick my parcels in the car and go to the next shop.  I only had to move my car 3 times!  I can also tell you with certainty that the weekend before Christmas, other shoppers get very testy when they think they can follow you to your car to take your parking spot, only to realize you are just stashing your goods and moving on. 

With no snow, ice or slush it does not feel like Christmas, notwithstanding the piped in Christmas music and the fake snow on the fake trees.  The sun was shining.  It was in the high 70s and at times I broke a sweat.  Shopping in the sun is hard work.

At the party we went to that night, I stood at the bar waiting for my holiday cocktail to be mixed just so and a friend noted I had gotten a sunburn.   I said, “No, that can’t be, I shopped all day . . . in the sun . . . oh my gosh, you are right!”  Yes, I got a sunburn Christmas shopping!  Don’t worry, it has already turned into a tan.

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