Black Friday Everglades Style

Late afernoon on Friday, I dropped the boys all off at our telephone and Internet free fish camp, then drove another 30+ miles into the Everglades to Clyde Butcher’s Big Cypress Gallery.  Clyde was there to autograph his books and calendars this weekend.  I had offered to go there to pick up a couple of autographed Florida landscape books for Baseball Boy’s teacher as part of the class gift.  I arrived with 28 minutes to shop.  While I was there, I decided to get an autogrphed book for Mojo’s teacher also.  Apparently I was a bit tired and dim witted.  I had Clyde autograph a book to a person with the first name of Mojo’s teacher this year and the last name of Mojo’s teacher last year.  At least I got the name right for Baseball Boy’s teacher and we can use a new coffee table book for the fish camp.

On the way back from the Big Cypress Gallery, I decided to stop at the Skunk Ape Research Headquarters.  Friends of mine from college and their 4 children are intrigued by the elusive beast and I wanted to pick up a present for them seeing I was out there anyway.  It was a very productive stop.  They had an unusually large inventory of Skunk Ape items.  I was able to buy the whole family matching Skunk Ape long sleeve t-shirts.  The clerk was so excited that I was buying unprecedented amounts of merchandise that he offered all items at a discount.  It was a very smart marketing technique.  I added 10 drink Koozies (half off! – 6 for them and 4 for us) and Skunk Ape fishing hats for the boys in their family.   I even bought a fancy red Skunk Ape hat for myself, which Baseball Boy has since converted for his own use.  The clerk then threw in bumper stickers and a Skunk Ape Field Guide free of charge! 

As the clerk was adding up the huge pile of items, I wandered back and found the Skunk Ape DVD and CD combination.  He told me that his brother sang on track 7 and . . . believe it or not . . . his brother was in the camp ground behind the store.  He gave me the code to get through the gate and assured me that I would find his brother if I drove ’round back.  Against my better judgement, I took the code and drove toward the dark, scary one-way gate.   It was open when I got there so I slowly drove through all the while calculating my exit strategy.  It felt a bit like an everglades style deliverance.  I inched my way down the dirt driveway and was greeted by the brother and his dog on small old cart of some sort.  He stopped me wanting to know where I was going and whether I was planning to camp for the evening.  Thinking that was an odd question to ask a lone woman in a newer model Cadillac with no camping equipment, I just smiled and said, “Are you David?”  He said, “Yeeesss, Maam!”  I told him I was there only to get his autograph on the DVD I had just purchased.  He acted like this happens all the time and graciously personalized the autograph to my friends’ family.  I thanked him and he invited me back the next night for a live concert at the camp.  I was then temporarily trapped by a large fifth wheel camper that blocked me in while they got their lot number for the night. 

In the vast darkness, deep in the wilderness, I half expected the Skunk Ape himself (or herself?) to walk by and tip his “Ask me about the Skunk Ape” hat at me.  It didn’t happen.  I guess that was just a bit too much to ask.

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If you are an internet shopper, you can save the gas by going to Clyde Butcher’s website and the Skunk Ape Research Headquarters’ website (complete with a picture of David and the Skunk Ape), but you will give up the “gotta see it for yourself” experience.